Dream the life you want, live the life you Dream

As you may be aware, I’ve been spending time learning recently.  Expanding my knowledge so that I can offer more support to the families I work with.  It’s been amazing.  As my knowledge is growing, I am growing as a person.  I feel myself opening spiritually as I grow into the work that I am seeking to do.  The work I feel born to do.

I often struggle to find focus.  I have what I like to call a busy mind.  There’s usually lots of thoughts happening all at once.  It gets busy.  I find myself wanting to jump from one thing to the next without ever really finishing any task that I am working on.  It makes me feel overwhelmed.

To help me keep focus on learning and coursework, I’ve been writing down what I want to work on in the future.  The ideas I want to grow so I can refer back to them.  So I can revisit the ideas when I have time.  Ha!  Time.  That elusive commodity that we seem to never have enough of.  Or do we?

I have moments of considering having a business coach on and off.  I’ve felt that if I had someone to guide me in my work I would have more structure.  The creative part of my work would flow more easily.  I would have accountability and deadlines.  But do accountability and deadlines compliment creativity (I am, after all, the creator of my own work)?  Or are they simply traits I am trying to apply to my work from the many years I have spent in employed work?

There are a few things that I do just for me, to nourish my spirituality (the amazing Women’s Circle that I am a member of being one of the key things that I am a part of).  As I mentioned at the beginning of this piece, I am opening more in a spiritual sense at the moment.  As this has been happening I started to manifest the coaching I mentioned.  I had created a barrier to this though for reasons I shan’t get into here.  As I had created a barrier, it wasn’t happening.  Eventually I decided to stop saying “I want some coaching, but I can’t have it because [insert excuse here]”.  And then….. along came Lucy Tobias

Lucy is a Shaman, Manifesting Coach and Spiritual Mentor and I am a member of her closed group on Facebook.  A few weeks ago she ran a competition to win some coaching sessions.  She launched the competition with a Facebook Live video and as she was talking, I could hear myself shouting “yes, yes, yes”.  And!  I won the competition! 

Now, I believed I needed business coaching, but I hadn’t worked on specifically manifesting that.  I manifested coaching and so I received what I believe I really needed.

Following my most recent session with Lucy, I discovered that I wanted some time away from social media.  I have a very love / hate relationship with Facebook.  Yes, it enables us to maintain connections with people we know, but it doesn’t show reality.  Not for most people anyway.  I know I post the parts of my life that I want to share.   The good bits. After Louis was born I only posted the good parts of our lives.  The period of time where I felt too anxious to leave the house never featured on Facebook, for example, all I posted were photos showing the fun stuff I was doing with Louis by myself and creating the illusion of being busy.

So this weekend I’ve not been on Facebook!  Today my self-imposed time out is over (apparently there’s a Facebook jail, I’ve never been, must work on that – haha) and I’ve yet to log on.  I’m kinda dreading being sucked back in again.  You see, it is addictive and when I’m not on there I have so much more time!  In fact, I would describe living without Facebook as being liberating!

Part of my work with Lucy has been around journaling and something she has encouraged me to do daily is to write about my dream day.  It doesn’t have to be focused around the plans I may already have for the day ahead.  It’s a dream day in the future where anything can happen.  And this is a part of the manifesting I’ve started with Lucy. 

On Saturday evening, I decided to take this manifesting a step further and get out my vision book.  A vision book, by the way, is essentially a vision board (a tool used to help clarify, concentrate and maintain focus on a specific life goal) but as it’s in book form, you can keep keep adding to it more easily.  Grow it, evolve it and work on more than one aspect.  There’s a page from the stuff I worked on on Saturday night in the header to this blog entry.

Alongside journaling I’ve filled my time with doing some art with Louis (yesterday we painted, later we will make pizza), dancing around the living room and reading.  I’ve been reading Breathe magazine (a fab magazine I highly recommend you look out for, it is filled with well written and thought provoking articles and doesn't have any adverts) and I’ve also been revisiting Tom Hodgkinson’s How to be Free (this is a book a discovered several years ago and I really wanted to adopt the principles of being “free” of the pressures of modern living, but decided I couldn’t make it work at the time - ooh, another self-imposed barrier).  Last night I even made time to get my own pencils out and do some drawing by myself. 

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I’ve also had more time of nothingness.  I meditate and that is usually my time of nothingness.  In fact, I find meditation quite addictive as my mind is still and quiet (very unusual for me, as I mentioned) and I love to be in that space…. But whilst I’ve been away from social media I’ve found more time of nothingness.  I think most of us pick up our phone and absentmindedly open Facebook when we have nothing to do.  When we wait for the kettle to boil, wait in the queue at the supermarket, when we…. wait I guess?  Except we don’t wait.  We “do”.  In those moments of nothingness I have revisited this need for a coach.  I’ve decided I don’t need one right now.  Through this time, I have learned that I am the master of my future.  That I am enough (my ego was telling me I couldn't do this alone).  I know what I want to do and I just need to put all of that into place. 

I’m not discounting the need for business coaches (in fact I have just signed up to a free  5 day challenge with Suzy Ashworth, a business coach who specialises in supporting those working in the perinatal arena), but right now I don’t feel I really need one (wonder if that will change next week...).  What I needed was self-discipline and a little help from someone to unlock the me inside.

I most likely will find a time where I need a business coach.  I will know when the time is right for that. And I know one way or another it will happen if I need it.  For now I have Lucy and all that she is helping me to free myself from is all I need.  She’s helping me to unlock more and more of myself and it’s AMAZING!

And now.  Ah, I will log on to Facebook today.  I want to put this on my website and share it to my page!  I also have some other things to attend to as I’m starting a 5 day course about social media marketing today too.  But, once I’m all done I intend to step away from Facebook again.  Do more of that living my dream life of the creative.  The life where I am “being”, both in my work and at play.  And cooking up dreams for the days ahead so I can make those a reality too.  After all, how will I know what my dream life is if I don’t make time to dream.

Helen Discombe